Leaving Taiwan

For the past two years, I have lived, taught, played and loved in Tainan, Taiwan. Now I am leaving Taiwan to go back to the USA. God has blessed me so much in this time. He has given me a fun job, AMAZING co-workers, FANTASTIC friends and a great church family. I have had so much fun and learned so much.

I have tried several times to write down what God has taught me while in Taiwan. I have also tried to really sum up what Taiwan means to me and I can’t do it. I am not a great writer. I don’t have that knack of describing in a few words the essence of something, or  emotions.

Taiwan has been a time of releasing. When I came here, I had to release so much of my former life. I had to give up friends, family, possessions, pride, and independence. When you are overseas, you learn which of your friends really cherish you by the ones who make an effort to stay in your life. You learn to be okay without seeing your family often and not having people to constantly depend on. You leave everything behind, taking with you only what you can fit in one or two suitcases.  You have to lose your pride because when in a new environment, it is like you are a small child having to ask what to do even in simple situations. You have to learn how to be okay with sounding and looking dumb quite often. You have to give up some independence because, unless you speak the language, you can do NOTHING alone. You have to have help at the hospital, bank, post office, grocery store, gas station, everywhere.

But I have also gained SO much more than I had to give up. I gained new friends, a new perspective, a new language, new cultural traditions, new independence, new self esteem.

I gained friendships that are much deeper than ones I lost. I met people from all walks of life who are bound to me by such intense bonds of fellowship, laughter and tears that it makes other friendships seem silly. I gained such a huge global perspective. The world no longer seems so vast. I know people in all corners of the earth and I learned that those people are all very similar. They love, they cry, they hurt, they smile and they laugh. Nationality and culture mean little if you laugh and cry together. I learned how to communicate efficiently in a new language. I learned how important body language and charades are when you don’t know the right words! I learned how gracious people are when you are obviously, hopelessly confused! I gained a knowledge and appreciation for different traditions and holidays. Forevermore, I will celebrate Dragonboat festival, Moon Festivals, Chinese NewYear and other festivals. I will incorporate Taiwanese wedding traditions into my American wedding plans! I learned how to make traditional foods. I gained a different kind of independence that says… “Psshhh this isn’t hard. Hard is moving to a country where you don’t know anyone or anything and thriving.” I gained the independence that knows I could always move to another country and teach English! I gained the self esteem that comes with these skills. I gained self esteem from knowing that I am tough and can handle myself in a foreign country. I gained self esteem from my precious students telling me every day that I am beautiful, even when I felt I looked my worst. I gained precious life experience.

God has used Taiwan, my church, my friends and my experiences to tear down some large walls I had built around myself. I learned how to REALLY trust him with my life. He took painful experiences from the past and replaced them with positive things. I went through my first real crisis of faith here and have emerged much stronger and resilient.

And now I will leave.

Part of me is crying out to myself, “Why are you leaving? Are you crazy?” Another part is very happy and excited about the challenges I will face at my next job (which I will announce as soon as it is officially voted upon!” A large part of me is sad to leave the people who have taught me so much and supported me along the way. And yet another part is ready to  be home with my beloved family!

So… Taiwan. You have part of my heart. I will never forget you and I love you!

Firsts and Lasts

In the past two years I have had a lot of “firsts”. Now that I am leaving Taiwan and going home for good, I am experiencing so many “lasts”. I was thinking about some of the first and last things I am now doing.

The first time I flew long distance alone.

The first time I drove a scooter.

The first time I rode a high speed train/ or any train for that matter.

The first time I went grocery shopping at Carrefore.

The first time I celebrated Christmas without my family.

The first time I managed to order food in Chinese.

The first time I taught English to students whose native language is NOT English.

The first time I rowed with a dragonboat team.

The first time I went to Kenting.

The first time I traveled to India and China.

The first time I went to Taipei to see Alicia.

The first time I introduced holidays to people (Thanksgiving, Halloween)

The first time I took a ferry.

The first time I ate Stinky Tofu!

Now it is the last time I will

Shop at the open traditional market.

Bake in my tiny oven

Eat at Willy’s or Bus-7

Skype for hours with my parents

Chat with my roommate and friends.

Drink blueberry or raspberry juice.

Listen to Living Water Church worship and pray in Chinese.

Drink Bubble Milk Tea

Eat Mango Ice!

Eat dumplings!

Drive my scooter to the beach.

Be stared at wherever I go.

Be adored by all my students.

Take a nap during down time at work.

See my beloved friends and students.

Joke with my coworkers.

Sweat just sitting at my desk.

Live in fear of it raining on my way to work

Kill spiders and bugs large enough to eat a small dog! (just kidding)

Bake cookies for my small group

Eat sushi for one US dollar.

Teach students how to have basic conversation

2013 Graduation

This past week all of my 9^th grade and 12^th Grade students graduated from Junior High and High school. It is a bittersweet time as I am happy that they are graduating, sad because I will miss them and happy because now I have fewer classes!

For the high school’s last class, we had a “English Graduation Ceremony”.  High school graduation here is not a huge deal. They don’t wear anything special or really do that much, so I wanted to do something different.

So a few weeks earlier we started preparing. We used black paper to make graduation caps, took graduation photos, learned about graduation in America, and prepped for the ceremony.

On the last day of my class, we had our English Graduation! They did the usual walking in to Pomp and Circumstance, receiving the diploma and hearing a (very short) speech from their two teachers. It was fun and I think they enjoyed it!

On the actual graduation day, the students had a short(ish) ceremony that of course I understood little of. They sang a song together and after the ceremony, we partied!!

Of course, what I really mean is that the senior class and their teachers went to a Japanese restaurant and ate lunch together. It was a fun lunch though!

Dragonboat 2013

Dragonboat time came around again! This year I didn't row with a team! I was too busy and couldn't make all the practices. Instead I watched and cheered for my students, co-workers and friends! 

Poor Vince after his team lost!

Club Photoshoot!

These are some of my precious kids in my English Club. They were kind of shy about getting their photos taken, but I got a few!

Goodbye Grace

One of the women in  my small group left recently to head back to school in Canada. I only knew Grace a short time, but I loved her so much! She came into our small group and rescued me from being the only girl there! While in Taiwan, she learned more about her faith and now desires to live a life passionately for Jesus! As she goes back to school, please keep her in your prayers. Pray that she...

1. Continues to grow in her faith!

2. Finds a good church and friends who can encourage her in the Lord.

3. Has the courage to stand for her beliefs.

4. Has the ability to influence the friends she is returning to!

We had such fun at her going away party. We canoed, built a sandcastle at the beach, ate yummy food and laughed and laughed. I will really miss her!

Vanessa's wedding!

This past weekend, I was honored to serve as Vanessa's bridesmaid in her wedding to Brandon. Here's just a few photos from the weekend.

Happy Mother's Day

Today is Mother’s Day!!!

We're pretty goofy.

Once again, I am not where I can hug my mother on this day. Last year, on Father’s Day, I wrote a post honoring my wonderful father, so this year I want to honor my even more wonderful mother.

So here are just a few of the life lessons I learned and wonderful things about my Mother!

First, I would like to say that my mom and I have had a tumultuous relationship, especially while in my teens. Dad says it is because we are so similar in temperament. I don’t know. However, as I grew up, our relationship has gotten so strong.

This post was difficult for me to write. I struggled with getting my thoughts on paper.

With my father, it was so easy because many of the lessons are easy to explain. But how does one explain that she has taught me everything I know about life.

But here it goes. Mom, I hope that you enjoy this.

1. She has been such an example of what a wife and mother is to be. If I can be just half of the woman my mother is, then I will be happy. We call her the Domestic Goddess and Mary Poppins (because she is practically perfect in every way).She stayed at home from the time I was born until I was in high school. We never came home to an empty house. While my other friends were cooking themselves ramen noodles and Mac-n-cheese, I was getting home cooked meals for every meal (she fixed our lunches most of the time). I remember having tea parties and inviting her when I was small. She sewed so many of my clothes. Our house was always clean.
2. She showed me how strong women can be. While my father traveled for his job, she ran the household. She pays the bills and manages everything for our home. While they make decisions together, she is one of the strongest and most practical women I know.
3. She taught me how to be a self sufficient person. She taught me how to cook, clean and sew. Because of her, I have never turned my white laundry pink, or had to always eat out. Because of her, I know how to keep a house clean. When I do have a question, she is the one I call.  I don’t know how many women I know who are my age, who can barely cook and don’t have any idea about housekeeping. Because of my mother, I am not one of them.
4. She showed me what a Godly woman looks like. Every morning, I would get up and go into the living room where she would be having her quiet time or praying. Every morning.
5. She was always there for me. Because my dad traveled for his job, she is the one who was there for us. She was at my games and concerts. She was at every birthday. If I forgot my lunch or project at home, I called her. She tucked me in at night, singing “Swing Low” to me.
6. She has such a big heart. My mother is generous to a fault. If you need anything, and it is in her power, she will do it for you or give it to you. When the missions team at her church went to Nicaragua, they reported that many of the girls don’t have a nice dress to wear to church on Sundays. So my mother organized people to sew Pillowcase dresses to send to Nicaragua. She sewed hundreds of them herself! HUNDREDS!!
7. Even though, she puts herself down and tells you that she isn’t smart, SHE IS!!! She is one of the most practical people I know. She has common sense in spades.
8. She is the steady influence that keeps the family together. Without her, we would be lost. 
   

Convictions

A few weeks ago, I was attacked (verbally) for my beliefs. I’m not talking about my Christian faith. No I’m talking about the hot topic right now (Homosexuality). It came out of nowhere. I have never openly stated what I believe, because up to this point, I figured if someone knows me and my faith in God, that they would know what I stand for. I had never been asked outright. Even more, I have never doubted what my convictions are.

In my small group, there were some people who were trying to figure out what their convictions were. One of the guys decided that he would write out his thoughts about homosexuality on Facebook. I was the first person to comment on it. I simply said that I was proud of him for expressing his beliefs. I did not state my beliefs, or say I agreed with him. (I do, though) It exploded with vicious comments and arguments. He later removed the post because of the vehement arguments that people were conducting.

Weeks later, I was at a restaurant owned by a foreigner. I was having a great meal with my friends when the owner started talking to us about the writer of that post. He then proceeded to point out that I supported this friend and his beliefs. He began to list all of the reasons that I was wrong and all the reasons that Homosexuality is ok. He asked me what would happen if someone in my family was a homosexual. He told me that Jonathan and David were lovers.  I told him, I didn’t want to discuss it. He got flustered and told me that was my problem.

Instead of handling it well, I just told him again, I didn’t want to talk about it and left it at that.

What I should have said was that I was having a (rare) dinner with my girls and I didn’t want to waste that time talking about something of that nature. I did not bring the subject up, he did. No matter what either of us said, we were not going to change each other’s minds, so why bother wasting time about it.

He didn’t ask either of the other two girls who share the same convictions what they believed. No he attacked me because I supported a friend on his convictions.

I left the restaurant upset and cried on the way home.

I honestly don’t know how, as Christians, we are to handle these situations. I try to love people. I don’t care if you are Homosexual, atheist, Muslim, whatever, I want to show you love. But I don’t have to agree with your choices. I am not forcing anyone to agree with mine. But people who are against Christianity don’t feel the same way. To them, I am hateful and wrong and must be argued with. I don’t like to talk about these kinds of things, because it only makes others angry.

So here is what I believe.

I believe that Homosexuality is a sin.

The Bible says it is and if you believe that the Bible is truth, you can’t argue with this.

We should not condone sin.

I believe that we (as Christians) should continue to show love to Homosexual people.

Jesus ate with prostitutes and lepers.

I don’t know what this world will look like in 20 years (when I’m 46), but I am sure that homosexuality will still be around. We are not going to escape it. I don’t have the answers. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what is going to happen. But I do know this: God knows. He will not abandon us. Perhaps we will continue to be ridiculed for our beliefs. This will be the same until Jesus returns.

But  we must show love.

***** Not that anyone reads this, but please, please, please don't start vicious arguments or tell me that I'm dumb or whatnot... That's the point of this whole post.

March and April

Life since India has been really chill. When I say chill, I don’t really mean it. It has been crazy busy and fun (most of the time). So here’s a quick recap of the past few months.

-           Had a lovely dinner and movie birthday party with my friends… No pics for some reason. Saw Les Miserables in theatres and it was so AMAZING!

-          Checked another thing off the bucket list when a few of us went to Pingxi, Taiwan to see the Sky Lanterns. It was truly wonderful. We didn’t get as close as we would have liked (It was crazy crowded) and we didn’t get home until like 5 a.m. Would I do it over again? IN A HEARTBEAT! Do I want to go again…. NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Too many people. We did buy a lantern and paint our wishes on it and let it go into the sky.

-          School began…

-          Chinese learning continues.

-          I have been seriously looking for a job in Alabama. So far, I have had NO bites. I have applied to every job available on the state department and am in the process of applying personally. It is so hard because I have so much going on.

Zoe and I at Juiwu's Wedding!

Hot Pot with Elizabeth!

-          Because YES. June 30 I will leave Taiwan for good. It is SO scary. I am terrified. I have grown so accustomed to life here that I’m so scared of coming home. I have to find a job, buy a car, make new friends, reunite with old friends, and adjust to life back in America. If I don’t have a job, I will live with Mom and Dad while substitute teaching and working part time wherever I can get work. I hate to be that girl that lives with her parents but I have no choice!

-          I have also given up my small group and started attending a small group led by the pastor’s wife. There were so many reasons that I needed to give up my small group. I loved having it, but I was not the best leader and I needed to focus on my walk with God for a while. I was pouring into other people’s lives, but no one was pouring into me. Since I am leaving, it made sense to give it up now, especially when several people in it graduated and left Taiwan. It was the best decision I have made in a while. I am really enjoying my new group and it has opened doors for friendships with new people!

Lovely Rainy Night

Spicy Hot Pot

-          Was asked to be a bridesmaid for my roommates wedding.

-          Ordered this dress http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Short-Satin-Off-the-Shoulder-A-Line-with-Ruching-83168_Bridal-Party-Bridesmaids-Shop-By-Color

-          Began to seriously get fit…

n   Ok so I have issues with talking about weight loss. Mainly because for years and years and years, I talked about it, but did nothing. So this might be the only time I talk about it until I lose a substantial amount of weight. So yeah… I’m fat. And I’m tired. So I’ve started changing my food. Not a diet… a lifestyle change. And here’s the thing, I can’t eat certain foods in moderation. If I have one Oreo, I’m going to have 5. That’s just how I am. So it’s easier not to have any. I am eating TONS of fruits and veggies along with protein.

n   I am also really working out. I have been going to Curves for several months, but now I am working on going more days a week.

n   I am also doing Jillian Micheal’s 30 Day Shred… The woman is a beast. I hate her and love her, depending on the day.

n   I have to stand up in front of a bunch of people in 26 days. I WILL stand out because I will be the only non-Asian in the wedding… yeah. I’m hoping that Jillian will help me drop a size or two and that the healthy clean eating will help me drop the weight.

n   I am going to begin TRYING to run. I HATE running. I have never run a whole mile in my life. I am fat, have asthma and bad knees. This could be ugly. I have a nine week plan to follow. Yikes!!

-          So Wow! Looking over this, I am seeing how much has really changed in my life since February! My life is going pretty well right now! I hope God is receiving glory from it!